Sagat Dekkers (finished)

Novice Posts : 3 Age : 28 Join date : 2018-02-22

|BASICS|
Name: Sagat Dekkers
Age: 19
Gender: male
Race: Human
Birthplace:Empire of the sun
Current Residence: empire of the sun
Bender or Non-Bender: Bender
Rank: None
Occupation:Prize fighter
Element: Fire

|PETS/MOUNTS|

Name: (Name of the pet/mount)
Age: (Age of the pet/mount)
Picture: (What does your pet/mount look like?)
Personality: (Personality of the pet/mount.)
Brief History: (History of the pet/mount)

|WEAPONS|
Name:
Picture:
Brief History:

|OPTIONAL|
Birthday: Unknown
Hobbies: fire bending and martial arts.`
Quirks: Sagat keeps a book of all his romantic encounters.
Family: Unknown
Character Theme:

|APPEARANCE|
Height:6'4)

Image: Sagat Dekkers (finished) 29b1w61

|CHARACTERISTICS|
Personality: Sagat has two personalities within himself. The main personality Sagat Dekkers is a care free fighter with a passion for adventure. Sagat is always looking for the strongest opponents he can find in order to prove himself above all others. He will go to great lengths and risk anything in order to chase the feeling of battle. Outside of fighting he is a romantic who enjoys his ability to please. Sagats Religious beliefs always cause him to have a pride in who he is. Outside of fighting Sagat is a humble laid back kind of person. Unless engaged in some kind of competition where he will be confident.

The Heavenly King: Is an alter ego of Sagat , who is a ruthless fighter. The heavenly king is very proud and views others who do not fit his warrior ideology as below him. The heavenly king is cold and callous anyone he deems not worthy of his time. The heavenly king is also arrogant. The heavenly king is very cock almost all the time even when fighting.

Personal Strengths: strong , determined , vicious and charismatic
Personal Weaknesses: girl crazy , prideful , conflicting split personalities.
Hamartia: Pride
Personal Hero: A legendary figure of a prideful warrior prince who was said to have shook the earth with his might.
Dreams and Ambitions: Sagat wishes to be the strongest fighter in the world.

The heavenly king wishes to conquer the world and revert the system to a survival of the fittest savagery. Leaving the weak with nothing but an open grave.
Likes: fighting , woman , poetry

Dislikes: weaklings , betrayal , insects and alcohol

Brief History:Sagat was born to unknown parents in the Fujikawa province. The only thing Sagat knows about his parents was that his mother was a prostitute in the slums. Who had abandoned him as a baby leaving him in the care of the warrior monks at a rural temple. The first night at the temple a great lightening storm unleashed it fury around the temple. The monks took this as a sign from the warrior god Manki as a blessing for the new child they had received.

From then on Sagat was trained in the art of Muay Thai. From the ages of 5 to 16 Sagat Honed his craft over hours of training under his strict masters. The constant fighting and training hardened Sagats body making him able to ignore pain to a degree and a solid chin. Along with Muay Thai the monks also taught him Wu-Rai A religion based on the teachings of the great warrior sage Jacken. After studying the book of the war gods. This lead to Sagat becoming a Patron of the war god Manki and the warrior sage Jacken.

After turning 17 the monks prepared Sagat to leave the temple on his Warriors Journey. A right of passage that Sagat had been hoping for since he would than be allowed to leave the temple. The temple had been boring to him years without visitors and no other children made the temple a boring place.

On one of the training exercises Sagat and one of the elders who was also a fire bender was trying to teach sagat to use fire bending together with muay thai in order to make him a stronger fighter. However during the exercise the both were attacked by a large dog bear. Sneaking up behind them both the dog bear pounced on the elder killing him infront of Sagat causing him to go into a state of shock. Caused a fight or flight response from Sagat making his ego splinter giving birth to the Heavenly king. In this new state he attacked the lion dog without mercy mixing vicious elbow and knee strikes with fire igniting the furred animal. The rush and the fear of breaking another living things fueled sagat to fight in a blind trance. By the time he came to he was laying on his back next to the badly burned bear dog. Passing out again the next time he awake was back in the temple with the monks taking care of his wounds.

One year later the journey ceremony for Sagat in his honor however , Sagat did not care of such parties and left to start his journey early in that morning. First spending a year traveling all around the Sun empire seeing many new strange things and picking up new habits like his romance book.

Subject: Re: Sagat Dekkers (finished) Wed Feb 28, 2018 12:01 am

Okay, so for the most part, it's pretty good. That being said, there's certain standards that we got around here to make sure everything's in working order.

First of all, I have no idea what sport bending is. If you're referring to the Pro Bending present in Legend of Korra, it doesn't exist in this universe, so you can forget about that.

I'm gonna choose to ignore the technical issues in the writing itself, but as a general rule of thumb, don't capitalize letters after a comma and be careful of run-on sentences. That's what I've got to say for now, other staff members might grade ya a little differently. Work on the things I mentioned, and we'll check this over again.

Subject: Re: Sagat Dekkers (finished) Wed Feb 28, 2018 12:21 am

The app is good, but, I have a bone to pick about the dissociative identity disorder/split personality disorder bit of your application.

The main personality (Sagat) and the alter (Heavenly) are too similar of personalities, usually with the disorder, the personalities are opposites. You said as a weakness that the personalities conflict - they do not sound like they would at all in my opinion. Also, just because the Sagat cares about someone/something doesn’t mean Heavenly will or has to. Each personality is allowed to care about different people or things.

Lastly, they are not the same person, they are two personalities sharing one body.

Novice Posts : 3 Age : 28 Join date : 2018-02-22

Changes made

Subject: Re: Sagat Dekkers (finished) Fri Mar 02, 2018 1:37 pm

I’m going to nitpick and say there needs to be more differences in the personalities, explain their personalities more outside of fighting. Also, it needs to vary a bit more with the fighting styles as well.

Novice Posts : 3 Age : 28 Join date : 2018-02-22

If the monks only know muay thai it would not make sense for one of them to have a different fighting style since he would not have someone to learn it from. Also can you explain what more differences you mean because one is laid back humble but confident person. The other is an arrogant and cocky person with a superiority complex what would make them more different?

Subject: Re: Sagat Dekkers (finished) Tue Mar 06, 2018 12:24 pm

You have a point about the fighting styles, my apologies. But, when it comes to split personality disorder, there are more differences with the personalities than just three things. There needs to be more personality especially on Heavenly King, and a few more differences between both personalities.

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