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| | Madame Kouzma's Advice, Help and Admittance Column | |
| | Author | Message |
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Fire Lord Kouzai Loremaster General
Posts : 4839 Age : 28 Join date : 2009-03-29 Location : Well I used to have a life, but now I own the RPG, just kidding, but really
| Subject: Madame Kouzma's Advice, Help and Admittance Column Mon Nov 17, 2014 10:13 pm | |
| Hello, I am Kouzai. Or at least I was. I am now Madam Kouzma; for as long as I run this column. This is my personal advice and help section. I am making this out of desire to help others. You need advice? I give advice! You need help? I give help! You need to admit something? Just call me Mother Superior Kouzma! I'll be just like Dear Amy, only I'm Dear Kouzma. Now I understand not everyone likes to admit things or ask for help in the public eye. Therefore, Madame Kouzma has allowed for you to ask things anonymously darlings! You can either PM your problem; give yourself a unique nickname in the message topic so I know who to reply to on here. Or you can ask things anonymously on the topic here by using the Public Access account: Anony-moose. Here's the information: Username: Anony-moose Password: Moose55 Thanks for listening! And remember, when you need help, don't whine and yelp! Write Madame Kouzma today! | |
| | | Anony-moose Novice
Posts : 1 Age : 441 Join date : 2014-11-17 Location : Moose-land
| Subject: Re: Madame Kouzma's Advice, Help and Admittance Column Fri Nov 21, 2014 1:00 am | |
| Madame Kouzma,
I'm having girl troubles. I just don't understand it- I've got honor for DAYS, but I can't get this girl to notice me. I've tried winning her heart in battle, asking for a token before a joust- I've even tried Seppuku! What can I do to get senpai to notice me?
~Seppuku in Seattle | |
| | | Fire Lord Kouzai Loremaster General
Posts : 4839 Age : 28 Join date : 2009-03-29 Location : Well I used to have a life, but now I own the RPG, just kidding, but really
| Subject: Re: Madame Kouzma's Advice, Help and Admittance Column Fri Nov 21, 2014 10:01 pm | |
| Dear Seppuku in Seattle, Have you tried starting a war with the Ikko-Ikki sect of Buddhism? They are a rather corrupt sect that abuses the willingness to die of their members for their own advantage, turning them into unsatiable hordes in order to oppose samurai role. They dine and live in decadence, and enjoy temptations of the flesh. I hear the leader of the sect is even married, and to the daughter of a samurai family no less. He's a brother-in-law to Takeda Shingen. I recommend you march upon their lands to send a warning to them and the girl before they're too late; she may have been taken in by them and thus ignoring your advances. March on Mt. Hiei with an army of twenty thousand, burn and destroy all settlements at the base and slaughter every man, woman and child you find--especially if they are not related to this conflict. I then recommend working your way up the mountain, burning down every and all temples as you go until finally you reach the top, and slaughter all the Warriors monks, thus ending their order's existence forever. Bonus points if you use riflemen with matchlock guns. Failing all of that, perhaps if you are honest and direct with the girl. Do not worry if you feel unready or unprepared, if humanity waited for themselves to be ready before doing anything nothing would ever get done. Talking to a girl is like getting into a cold pool, deep breath and then take the plunge. Perhaps she's just as nervous and shy as you are--or perhaps she wants you to chase her. Either way, always be honest. Hope it works out, Sincerely, Madame Kouzma | |
| | | Loolaalee Questmaster General
Posts : 1351 Age : 25 Join date : 2014-01-08 Location : The cold heart of space
| Subject: Re: Madame Kouzma's Advice, Help and Admittance Column Mon Dec 01, 2014 5:09 pm | |
| Hey Madame Kouzma, is it okay if I log into the Anony-moose account and customize it? You know, profile picture, age, gender, all that jazz? | |
| | | Fire Lord Kouzai Loremaster General
Posts : 4839 Age : 28 Join date : 2009-03-29 Location : Well I used to have a life, but now I own the RPG, just kidding, but really
| Subject: Re: Madame Kouzma's Advice, Help and Admittance Column Mon Dec 01, 2014 7:21 pm | |
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